Your Kid the Olympic Athlete
As I watch (OK, I’m GLUED to) the Olympics, I’m struck by the number of interviews where athletes mention how their parents were their first coaches. And yet, I’ve observed many parents who worry that they’re somehow overbearing if they practice a sport with their kids. I think the most important thing a kid picks up from sports with parents is not expertise or brilliant coaching. It’s passion and discipline.
How many of us were THRILLED as kids when Dad taught us how to throw? Or when we could shoot hoops with big sister? Kids crave that mentoring and attention from parents. Our ancestors taught their children how to hunt or tend livestock. We’re mistaken to hand those mentoring moments to coaches and teachers.
It’s become a popular myth that we’re “pushing our kids too hard” these days. Whereas I agree that today’s kids have more and bigger problems than we did, I’d like to see the hard evidence that it’s actually caused by a parent coaching her own kid in sports or music. One can tell in 2 seconds whether a kid genuinely enjoys the activity.
And you know what? Kids enjoy activities in which they can win or excel, no matter how many times we tell them to “Just have fun.” The best way to keep your child fit and enjoying a sport is to help them get good at it FAST, so that they experience a thrill for their efforts, and then they’re hooked for life. Instead of treating competition like a dirty word, let’s acknowledge that kids may not enjoy losing, but they LOVE competing. Sibling rivalry is instinctive, and so is competition.
The last attempt I saw at expunging competition in the name of equality didn’t end too well for the Soviet Union. I have yet to see a workplace where competition isn’t a factor. Let’s prepare our kids for life in the real world, by teaching them to enjoy competition, not deny it. Learning to compete with GOOD SPORTSMANSHIP is what builds character and develops life-long exercise habits. Kids need to learn the discipline it takes to improve at a skill. What better forum than sports or music?
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Rev. David Code is an Episcopal minister and family coach. His blog at the Centre Daily Times: http://community.centredaily.com/?q=blog/1305
His published articles and a 2′ video of his seminars: http://davidarthurcode.com/bio-david/
