Imagine for a moment that you’re in a room with the door closed. You notice that smoke is starting to seep underneath the door into the room. How would you respond? What would you say?

A group of researchers did an interesting study a few years back where they took subjects and put them in a room by themselves. Sitting alone, they didn’t know what was going to happen and then smoke started coming under the door. What they found was that the people who were alone in the room responded quickly. They got worried and knocked on the door, or picked up the telephone to find out what was going on with this smoke.

What the researchers found was that with a dozen people in the room, in the same smoky situation, the response time was about ten times longer. Why would that be? I would guess that each of the dozen people in there was thinking in her mind, “What should I do? Am I the only one who sees that smoke? Haven’t the other people noticed? Maybe they’re in on the joke and I’m not in on it, so I am not going to embarrass myself and mention the smoke.” Therefore, nobody says anything until the entire room is choking. Social psychologists refer to this as the “Bystander Effect,” where people defer responsibility for acting. At what point should someone speak up?

In John 19:38-42, Joseph of Arimathea was a respected member of the Jewish council that sentenced Jesus to death. However, Joseph was also a secret disciple of Jesus. Joseph boldly requested Jesus’ body so that he could bury it according to Jewish custom. I stress the word boldly because traditionally with crucifixions, one of the humiliations was that the body was left on the cross to rot. It was never buried until after birds of prey had come and torn the corpse to pieces. When Joseph of Arimathea requested the body of Jesus from the highest leader, Pilot, that indeed was a bold move. By doing so, Joseph clearly associated himself with the most unpopular man there was.

What’s unique about Joseph of Arimathea is that all four gospels mention him. They all synch-up on Joseph. Mark says he was a respected member of the council and by this we can imply the Jewish Supreme Council, which was the committee that sentenced Jesus to death. Matthew says that Joseph was a rich man. John says he was a good and righteous man. Both Mark and John say that he was waiting expectantly for the kingdom of God, so I think that we can safely infer that he was a man of faith.

Here’s the key point: if Joseph was on the supreme council that sentenced Jesus to death, then in theory he could have turned the tide of the whole event. He could have been that dissenting voice that spoke up and said, “No I don’t think it’s right to crucify Jesus.” Through eloquent speech or some other means, Joseph could have convinced the council not to crucify Jesus. So what happened? Did Joseph sell out? Did he chicken out and not protect the man of whom he was a secret disciple? Or did Joseph make a wise decision? Perhaps he saw that the battle was already lost and there was nothing he could do to make a difference, so he cut his losses and retreated. He waited until after Jesus was dead in order to give him a respectful Jewish burial.

What can you and I take away from Joseph of Arimathea’s story that will make a difference in our lives now? We can learn much from the classic leadership dilemma that he faced: “How can I best use my influence and power in this situation?”

Joseph of Arimathea took four important stands:

1) He chose to be a disciple of Jesus, at great risk to his reputation and person; but

2) He chose to keep his discipleship secret, since he was a rich and respected man, and Jesus was neither;

3) He chose to remain silent when voting to decide Jesus’ fate; and

4) He chose to take a stand for a lost cause and speak up to Pilate when it came time to bury Jesus’ body.

These were his decisions, and history tells the rest. In hindsight, of course you and I know that God had a plan, and the plan was taking place as it was supposed to. However, Joseph did not know then what you and I know now.

When have you been faced with a dilemma like Joseph of Arimathea? Maybe it was a situation with a group of people and something went wrong, or someone was being criticized, condemned, fired, or voted out. Maybe there came a point at which you chose, consciously or unconsciously to either take a stand or say nothing. In that moment, what did you do? Did you abstain? Did you choose to miss that meeting? Did you choose to remain silent or did you take a bold stand?

These situations are never black-and-white choices, are they? These dilemmas don’t show up in our lives on a billboard with twelve-inch letters saying, “Ethical dilemma here. Choose yes or no.” It is seldom that clear, and sometimes it is only clear in retrospect when it’s too late. It’s not just about abstaining or speaking up and taking a stand, because we all know the cliché that “fools rush in.” There are definitely situations where it is just not wise to take a bold stand. So how is one to decide?

Leslie is a college professor, and a friend of mine. She tells of the dilemmas she faces with her students: “I have on several occasions been asked for advice from young women who became pregnant and didn’t know what to do. My council to them was this: Evaluate your options and take a stand now. Don’t let time make the decision for you. At six weeks pregnant, three options are available: abortion, adoption, or raising the child yourself. After about four months of pregnancy, the choice of abortion has been medically eliminated. I tell these women they need to conscientiously make a choice before time makes it for them.”

A good tool for making decisions is looking at the best and worst-case scenarios. To sit down with pen and paper has an immediate calming effect when confronting a dilemma. Firstly, pray for God’s guidance, and record every option you can think of. Then, choose the best three. Next, write out the best-case scenario and the worst-case scenario of each of your three possible decisions. This should give you the clarity you need to decide. The final and most challenging step is to follow through on your decision. You will find that there is tremendous relief and liberty in acting on a decision, even if it turns out to be the wrong one.

In the throes of a dilemma we may find ourselves saying, “I don’t have time to deal with this. This is not my problem. I’m not in authority anyway. I can’t do anything to make a difference.” That’s the Bystander Effect. In these moments, we may want to believe we’re not selling out. We may choose to let it go and let someone else deal with it. I think God expects more of us than that.

We can only trust that God is directing our big decisions. Even when we make mistakes, God can use them to teach us valuable lessons that make us more useful servants in the future. Part of maturing spiritually is to carefully think through our values and principles, so that when the time comes to act we can rely on our thinking, resourceful mind, rather than a flood of anxious emotions. No one can do this work for each of us. It is the responsibility that comes with the gift of free will, and it is the essential forum in which our spiritual lessons are learned.

I invite you to pray now: “Lord, thank you for the example of Joseph of Arimathea. Teach me to be vigilant and decisive when these dilemmas come into my own life. Help me to discern the difference between chickening out and taking a stand. I pray for your strength and guidance to decide well, and to act boldly. Amen.”

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